Enough.. Im done with all the innocents things d.. My journey to the truth will ends here today.. I wont continue on in this same path that Id taken for the past 20 years.. Im faded up.. Now i will take a dif road… This blog will ends here today too.. JiNG will not be the same anymore forever.. Will GOD continues to be my strength?? GOD knews…
Last JiNG
What is true love?? My answer to those who asked me, will be " I no longer believe in True love".. but.. whats the true love i mean here?? is it 真爱 in chinese?? Cinta Sejati in Malay?? I guess i never think about it.. all i know.. There’s no such thing as " We are fated to be together".. I dont believe in "Jodoh".. May be thats why i said i dont believe in True love?? Did i mistaken between True love and Destiny??
I told one of my good fren that i no longer believe in true Love since three years ago.. now to think back.. may be before three years ago i oledi not believe in true love.. or in more simple words, I never believe in True love before… What make me think like tat? Its because, I still remember what i told my ex when she questioned about my love to her.. i remember i said something like this " I dont know what will happen tomolo.. I can’t said that I will love you forever.. Thats why i cant promise you to love you forever.. It will only be a lie if U want me to promise all that.. " .. Believe it or not, this is wat i said.. but i really dont remember why i said like that at that time.. is it because i never believe in True love?? or Because im playing words with my ex?? cos the convesation continue like this " But this is wat i can promise u.. Each day, i will put effort to increase my love towards u … by this, my love wont disappear.. and thats why i said, both way is playing important roles.. not only me alone..We are bf and gf.. i need you to help me to increase my love to u also.. if u promise to do that.. i can assure u i can maintain.. " .. haha.. thats how confidence i am at those days.. But things doesnt goes well in our way, and i failed to fulfill my promise..
So now whomever ask me whether i believe in true love or not.. i will deny and say that i wont believe in true love anymore.. Today i love you with my whole heart..to the bottom of my heart, even if i cross my heart for u .. doesnt means that tomolo will still love you the same.. Want or not.. i guess this is the fact we face in our life… I’m just try to be more realistic that im daring myslf to write all this.. May be after i write " i dont believe in true love" , i might ended single for the rest of my life.. hahaha.. But who cares?? Im just try to be more honest.. altho i realise the fact that gals nowaday dont really care about that.. they might like all those sweet sweet talks.. or all those words playing tricks.. I’m fade up with all those things d.. So.. any gal wanna come and try?? HAHa…
to all my fren.. whats your perpective about TRUE LOVE or DESTINY(JODOH)??
mind to leave few words below to let me know??
jing…
Few picture for you….
YinZi Acoustic Group
Course Trip With CourseMate
Penang Worship Seminar.. Im the only one that doesnt get effected by the Holy Spirit during HIGH PRAISE~!.. shit.. GOD dont love me??
This is what i become when no body love me.. HAHA
30 more minutes and it will be her birthday.. What I’m gonna do to wish her a happy birthday?? Have I really put it down oledi?? I guess I already did it.. but somehow, the uncomfortable feeling still there.. Do i have courage to wish her?? Will I be disturbing if i wish her at 12am?? Because I’m sure that guy will prepare everything to make her happy.. She doesn’t need a wish from me to make her birthday celebration a great one rite?? But her answer will be " I appreciate and hope for your wish really, because you are my good fren".. HaHa.. I guess I’m gonna wish her anyway ..
What I did today ?? Start from this morning.. when I wake up, guess what i did.. guess.. guess.. can guess ?? hehe.. Of coz i go and brush my tooth lar.. and wash my face.. Thats what i did everyday after i wake up.. But today quite special.. haha.. Guess what i did?? haha.. I went to my bathroom.. thinking to brush my tooth and wash my face at the same time.. so.. i took up my facial foam.. then my brush.. then i start to brush my teeth.. without realising that i put the facial foam on the brush not "darlie".. OMG~!! The taste damn terrible and yet i brush for so long.. shit shit.. haha..
Then for tonite, i look back to some old photos.. flashing back my old memories.. Below are some of the photos.. during the lundu trip.. I miss you all friends..
FIR in Red.. hehe
Roti and Toast in Kuching
Memories Stay On~!! See ya guys soon…
Happy Birthday Corinne.. Thanks for everything..
Shalom to everyone.. Im just back from mooncake festival.. I already tried my best to make this lantern festival a happy one.. But seems like it didnt hits my expectation… Not that the organizer not good enuf.. but I cant control myslf well enuf.. Keep all the feeling in my hearts.. make it burns so much and its hurt… I try to behave like nth happen, but some frens still can see tro me.. really sorry lar.. I tried my best to raise the mood up… Cant spend time to celebrate a special occasion with the one that u love, Its really a burden to be carried.. To think that she is spending her special moment with other guy, OMG.. Altho i said i will be her best fren, but the feeling is still there.. How many days should i take to totally forget about it?? how many months do i need? how many years are enough for me? Is it a mistake for me to declare that i will be her best fren?? Should i really forget her totally even as fren?? Sometimes i really want to be selfish.. care for nth else but my own feeling..
To all good guy out there, any recipe for me?? Or to all gal out there.. can let me know what u ppl really want?? I need something more practical.. something more logical.. Sorry that everytime i write my post..it will be sad or down one.. and i always ask for help… but i guess.. thats me rite?? come on..I said i will learn to let go..doesnt mean that i can archieve it in one day.. I really hope .. someone will support and care for me.. You wanna say that im desperate.. yes..im a kind of desperate.. desperate for care and concern..
JiNG
Hallow friends.. Here is my new post.. I wanna write something about "Let go when its time to let go" .. JiNG never knew how to let go one thing when he lost it.. He will took it seriously deep into his heart and this way always hurt him..
Well..recently i faced with MANY obstacles but only ONE lesson.. "you must let go when its time for you to do so".. I guess.. its time for me to really learn.. but how hard is it really? Is it possible for me to do so? To totally forget about my feeling towards something and yet still can be so close to it… If wan me to forget everything and not even remember her as fren.. i guess i can make it.. But to not love her and yet be her best fren, its something i really need to learn..
What make me think of letting it go?? Because if i didnt let it go.. It hurts both way.. I make myslf desperate, frustated.. and in the same time i will hurt her and make her felt uncomfortable.. Continue on like this will only brings bad results.. May be its really a histories for me.. May be I should really go for the one i love now.. All this while I always thought that if i cant let go the old one, its not fair for me to go for new one.. Sometimes even if i try to, it will fail because my heart is not there.. All ppl around you already continue on with their life and keep on moving towards their dreams, what will you archieved by standing there regreting about the past??
Recently my puppies dies.. the saddest one is not me, not my housemate.. its their mom.. the puppies mom, as i wrote this, she still crying outside..frustatedly.. finding her child.. keep on finding ways to come in our house for she though we did something to her child.. Last nite, she steal all our shoes and hide it in the bush.. No matter how much effort we try to sumbat all the lubang, she still trying her best to come in.. when we going out, she will look at us with somekind of eyes.. Me and my friends keep on saying to her " mei you liao lar ( no more d ) ".. study until uni standard , of coz we know she wont understand wat we say.. but we really hope she can let it go d.. until now.. im still felt very sorry for her.. its our fault that we didnt really take care of them.. sorry..
Well.. The Puppies’ mom really show the love of a mom.. i never see dog give such respond.. I can assure you, if you were here, you will feel ashame of yourslf and humankind somehow.. even a dogs love their child so much.. how come some moms just throw away their newly born son in the bush?? Even a dog appreaciate the life so much.. Dont we need to be ashame that we didnt appreciate our life enuf??
I know im declaring over and over again.. but Im really trying to move on with my life.. Pls pray for me.. I will let go.. Keep on moving forward.. continue on to be a good guy.. and continuing all my resolution… Thanks everyone.. Thanks GOD…
JiNG
