What The Heck Am I ???

moved to http://histories.blogspot.com for some reason..

Now everything is cleared to me.. I know why I’m sick.. ITs 13th the friday~!!! and 14th the saturday to me… haih.. since young, this two days had been my very bad days… I still remember when i first moved my house to susur jambu, my basikal will always pancit on those days… two years berturut-turut… then another time is i fell from my motorbike after trying to make a 90 degree cornering.. and last friday and saturday.. me sick like hell.. diu.. no wonder lar… luckily im not going to bukit tinggi on friday.. or else.. wauhahahah..  so.. the result of bukit tinggi.. is this —>

Today I get all this from Pusat Kesihatan UPM.. I will have a very good feeling about Malaysia everytime i visited that place(3 times only)… Ppl in there, almost all are friendly ppl.. with the smile in their face, their efforts to help you.. not so lan xi as those behave outside.. 3 different doc i saw , all are malays, and yet they try to entertain me… wuahhaa.. seeing me so down and weak, they will give some advice and jokes to make u felt better again.. wow.. if all malaysian are like them.. so good…

Advice from doctor - "dont always eat maggie mee lar, Go out buy nasi with sayur, bukan lebih senang??.. tak ya nak masak lagi… lan duo ar??? hahaha""

It’s been a while since I first desired to gather all sarikein youths in kl area for a prayer group.. I guess now its the time to really evaluate the importance of this intention.. It’s time to use the knowledge I learned so far.. Well.. I will start with its purposes..  What will this prayer group serves??.. For what reason that I desired to build up a prayer team in kl area?? First of all.. The prayer group will serves to fulfill spiritual needs of the sarikeian youth in kl area.. But how much can I provide?? or how much can we provide?? I’m not alone tho.. Besides, The Lord will also provide.. isnt it?? Then.. Why I try to go so far.. Is it tat I try to get attentions from others?? These had became my biggest worries.. The prayer group wont live long if I do it just for fame or popularity.. I hope I do have heart to serve.. I guess I will have to figure this out asap..

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Is this just a temporary "hangat-hangat tahi ayam"?? How far will I go to maintain this group?? Until the day of my graduation?? Until the day when I feel "Its enuf d.. "?? Truely.. If I cant be sure that I can be the sub-pillar to support this group until the end, its better not to start it.. Simon is leaving this sept.. Will I be able to continue all this alone?? Am I really alone?? I’m sure if I start all this today.. all of it will end around sept.. or might even ended before sept.. Will God then, perform miracle on it?? My own faith is having its up and down.. How much can I give?? I wonder…

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Ok.. now the third question.. Do they really need this?? May be im Syok sendiri here.. May be they  do fulfill their spiritual needs each day by their own?? Let’s say if they need it.. How many of them will come?? Or I rather say, how many of them realised that they need this spiritual fulfillment?? How many of them still care for their spiritual life?? To come for a gathering or prayer meet need sacrifices on times and efforts.. How many of them dare to take the step and come??  or How many of them willing to sacrifice in order to come?? I guess I’m worrying too much… But unless I solve all this question mark in my head.. I dont think I got any gut to start anything..

No man has a true pure heart in his flesh.. Nor do I… With these unpure heart.. If I am to go on and fight in this battlefield.. How many will stand by my side?? I wonder..

JiNG..